Giving Up

Never in my life have I contemplated giving up than these last few weeks.
I have seriously wondered if it would be possible for me to just stop, and still do what I want to do.
I realised the answer is no.
And besides,
I don't want to be the straight A student who had her whole life ahead of her who quit high school and screwed up her whole life.
I could easily do it.
But I'm not going to.
For now.

But does anyone else just get that feeling of being overwhelmed?
I came home yesterday, and the thought of having to walk up those stairs after such a stressful and tiring week nearly brought tears to my eyes.
Between the heat and the stress, and the wanting to give up,
all I could do was collapse on my bed and try to breathe.
All afternoon I was vacant.
I wasn't talking, I wasn't doing anything, because I didn't have the energy to be happy.
A smile or laughter was all too much for me, by the end of this week.

But I'm all good now.
It reminds me that no matter how hard something seems, it will get better.
You will heal
and you will live to smile another day.

I don't know what I was getting at here,
But I think I just needed to convince myself that giving up was not an option,
particularly seeing as I'm about to start some Physics study.
If there ever was a thing that I found hard and 'slit my wrists-y' it is Physics.

But all we can do is endure.
Just endure.
If it's all you can ever do, and this I have learnt this year,
All you must to is endure.
Endure the assignments
Endure the impending depression
Endure the workload
Endure the Maths question
Endure the constant demand of your attention and intelligence.
Just endure.
And, in the end, you will get there,
you will no longer need to endure, you can do it anyway.

I think I have said enough for one day
besides, I really must start this Physics!!