Fuck tianna, sort yourself out

I need to tell you
I need to tell you about it
But I can't
It's too hard,
Too bad
Too wrong
I don't know what's going on
I think I need a shrink -.-

Oh sweetie. You really are my sunshine.
thankyou. immensely. You're an amazingly beautiful person in every way
I love you

And one day blends into the next

I close my eyes but do not sleep
I cannot cry, and yet I weep
I wake up with mascara streaks
from my eyes and down my cheeks

I have not slept properly in weeks
I wake up feeling like I just went to sleep
I toss and turn, wake up every few hours and try to go back to sleep
the only thing that helps me sleep is that song
but that song makes me cry.
It's the only thing that actually makes me cry
I cry on the inside,I feel the overwhelming despair, but not the tears unless it's that song
But it's the only thing that puts me to sleep
So I put it on, and cry myself to sleep.
When I wake up i have mascara smudges and streaks down my face
and i don't remember crying

I've become the person I never wanted to be.
I'm self-obsesed, selfish and ignorant of everything and everyone around me
I've stopped caring for others, and concentrate on myself all the time
How do I go back
How do I undo these feelings
How do I take it back, without taking it back
How do you take back what needs to stay
How do you undo the best time of your life
How do you forget the strongest memories you have
How do you hate the person you love
Solution?
You don't.

Words of wisdom from Eamon Conway

"Do what makes you smile. As long as you're happy in this moment then that's what you have to do"

Thankyou for everything bro :)

You got it right Eminem, you got it right

I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can't breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High of a love
Drunk from the hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I sufficate

You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe
When you're with them
You meet
And neither one of you
Even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah them chills

You're gone

We don't talk like we used to
We don't say the same things we used to
It's not the same with you anymore
I wish it was
Sometimes I really wish it was
And other times I know exactly why it isn't, and then I don't mind as much
But still
I wish it wasn't this way
I wish things didn't turn out this way
But sometimes I think it's for the best
We're just not as similar as we thought

Bittersweet

You just made my day.
I have to stop this
I'm so screwed

I'm screwed

I thought I was ok
I thought I was coping
I can see the pictures, listen to the songs and cope
I lasted nearly a week. I coped for a good few days but then it all came crashing down
What do I do. tell me, what the fuck do I do
Because I'm not letting go. I refuse.
But I can't go on like this. Daily melt-downs, yeh that's the life, I can do that for 6 whole months
the worst part is knowing that nothing's changed
the worst part is knowing that nothing would be different if you lived here
And the hardest part is pretending that I'm fine
Putting on a smile
have my family joke about how I managed to survive 2 weeks without my boyfriend.
Well he's not my boyfriend, but I don't know how I survived anyway
I was actually worse off
At least you knew you had someone to go to
Someone who was with you despite the costs
That's the only thing I regret about this, is that he's not willing to try at least
And again, the hardest part is that I completely understand why
I cannot blame him
I cannot fault him in anyway
So I sit
and I wish for another 20 minute hug or foetal position hug
But I can't get that now
So I'm on my own
And finally my tear ducts work
But I don't know how to do this. How to have a casual conversation with you and not talk to you the way I want to. How do I not call you and talk for hours. How do I not stay up for hours texting. How do I not?
I'm in way over my head
I'm screwed